How to Keep Your BDSM Relationship Private

While the world is becoming more and more accustomed to seeing images of sex and all of its many flavors of fetish, the fact remains that BDSM is still not a sexual practice that is widely accepted. As a result, it is probably a priority for you to hide your lifestyle. At the same time, you may not want to completely go into hiding with your domination and submission. So, is there a healthy compromise between having the relationship you want and the privacy you need?

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Keeping Things Under Wraps
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The easiest way to ensure that your sex life stays your sex life is to never, ever talk about it. It’s true. When you only talk about your BDSM life with your partner, there’s no need to worry that the secret will slip out or that you might mention something to someone who should not know. While this is certainly a surefire way to allow your BDSM relationship to stay hidden, it is not always easy. If you live with others or if you spend a lot of time with vanilla folks, you might find yourself accidentally referring to things you’ve done in the bedroom. It happens. So, perhaps it’s to possible to be completely quiet, but simply not talking about anything outside of your home is the best possible way of ensuring complete privacy.

Your contract might be enough proof to ensure that your sexual fetishes are consensual, so have a contract that spells out exactly what you and your partner like to do when you’re alone. This way, should the worst happen, you have some sort of record of your agreement with each other.

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Reasons for Telling Others
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Though you might not want to tell anyone about your BDSM life for fear of troubles with other relationships, with custody battles, etc., there are many valid reasons for letting others know what sorts of sex you might enjoy. For example, if one of you in your relationship might become injured or even die from any of your BDSM practices, you will have a harder time explaining things in this difficult situation. Thus, it might be wise to tell someone close to you things you might be enjoying in the bedroom. You need not be specific, but you will want to let them know that if they should ever find something that relates to BDSM, this is normal for your relationship and completely consensual.

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Subtle Ways of Playing Games
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Of course, sometimes it’s more thrilling when you know others might find out. So, you may want to try to keep up your BDSM power exchange when you are out in public. Subtle things like ‘Yes Master’ and ‘Yes Mistress’ can easily sink a sub and a Dominant back into their bedroom mindset and positions.

Of course there are more subtle ways to do this as well so only you and your partner will know. You can do things like always have the sub fetch drinks or walk behind their dominant. Another idea is to always have the submissive ask permission to do things, which looks endearing to others, but is just another way the sub can continue to be a sub when not in the bedroom.

Your BDSM relationship is no one else’s business but your own, however, sometimes privacy isn’t always realistic. If you are concerned about accidents happening, it would be wise to let at least one person in on your extracurricular activities. But, of course, make sure it’s someone you can trust. In the end, there is no right or wrong answer as to whether you tell others about your BDSM. Just keep in mind that certain members of society may think you abnormal – and might take actions to punish you for your perceived perversions.

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To learn more tips and ideas on how to incorporate bdsm training
into your life visit ===> BDSM Slave Training Tutorial

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Regards,

Master Bishop

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3 thoughts on “How to Keep Your BDSM Relationship Private”

  1. Greetings Master Bishop,
    I find most of society is sick, so many on anti depressants anti psychotics pain killers etc..
    Jane Birkin said of Serge Gainsbourg (her husband at the time) and his supposed perversity in relation to his movie “Je t’aime moi non plus” that “his sickness is more interesting than other peoples so called health” I would agree. The sickness in society is partially due to the repression of natural curiosity and exploration of sexual adventure. I think more people need to know about so called perverse practices and realize that consensual sexual activities no matter how seeming “bizarre” are actually often a very healthy outlet, that when expressed with the right person or persons can be profoundly healing on many levels. Therefore I have no problem talking about my BDSM practices with my friends because I like open minded people and if they are my friends they will either accept or be curious but if they condemn me they are closed minded and I really dont have much time for them.
    I know its not for everyone and life can be tricky at the best of times but the truth continues to set me free !
    All the best
    Kilian

  2. I have always fantasized about a BDSM relationship and then, at 53, I finally found my Dom. Age plays no role in this and I am happier than I have ever been. Having no real experience, my Dom has been a kind and knowledgeable teacher while holding a crop in his hand. My submission and obedience has been an easy transition and I speak to everyone that has ever thought of trying this lifestyle. Don’t wait or waste another minute if this is something you want to delve into. Look for websites that can help you transition and find a Dom/sub that is right for you. Go slowly and make sure that you discuss all aspects of this relationship with your partner. This will prevent injury, uncomfortable situations and arguments down the road. This website has been very educational for me and I thank them very much for all the help they have offered. I am a very satisfied sub, wholely happy and content. For all of you considering this lifestyle, don’t wait! Now is the time to dive in and enjoy what you’ve been missing!

  3. Many thank you’s for your very informative articles. They are inspirational as well as educational and really help define and explain the great safe and consensual BDSM lifestyle. BDSM is a unique pre-agreed power exchange that allows both parties a win-win lifestyle.
    I only wished that I had known more about BDSM and had access to your valuable articles decades ago as the internet was not available to me at that time.
    Nevertheless, I am a true Dom at heart and look forward to properly MASTERING my sub in a 24/7 slave life style.
    Please keep up your timely articles and their archives.
    As always Domfrancisco is open to your articles and is grateful as sub susan’s article (on July 18th, 2012 4:47 am) has written.
    Wishing you and all BDSM hearts many blessings,
    Domfrancisco

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