Consensual Non-Consent

Consensual Non-Consent is a form of BDSM incorporating extreme power exchange. The play mimics non-consensual behaviour, but takes place between consenting adults.

What is Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)?

CNC is best described as edge-play, perfect for kinksters who prefer their BDSM wild rather than mild. We’ll talk a little more about edge play later, let’s start with CNC. The “non-consensual” part relates to the way the Dominant and submissive interact during the scenario.

The Dominant takes an aggressive stance, using force and power to take control of the submissive. Although the submissive has consented to play he or she will resist in various ways, such as fighting back, screaming, pleading, shouting, or trying to escape.

Despite its extreme nature, both parties derive pleasure from CNC. The Dominant relishes the opportunity to exert authority and the submissive revels in feelings of helplessness and fragility.

What is Edge Play?

Edge play involves engaging in BDSM activities that carry a level of risk. Typical edge play scenarios include abduction play, public humiliation, sexual assault and rape, breath play, extreme medical play, knives and sharps, water sports and scat, total power exchange, and consensual non-consent (CNC).

Edge play often involves instilling pain, fear, and humiliation, and this can evoke strong emotions. Needless to say, tolerance levels vary from kinkster to kinkster, and what’s considered extreme play by one person may be thought of as tame by another.

Who Engages in CNC?

CNC is intense, so it’s more suited to experienced BDSM players, rather than nervous newbies. This type of play requires trust and effective communication and the submissive travels to the outer edges of their comfort zone. Boundaries are often stretched and limits tested, so this play often appeals to those in a D/s relationship.

Is CNC Safe, Sane, and Consensual?

Responsible BDSM players adopt the well-known kink mantra Safe, Sane, and Consensual (SSC), but can non-consensual play be consensual? Yes, it can! When done correctly, CNC creates the illusion of fear, minus any real danger.

The act of being overpowered and forced can prove arousing. The submissive can consensually give up power, trusting their Dominant to tease and torment, safe in the knowledge they won’t come to any real harm. CNC lends itself well to kink exploration but both parties need to know how far play can go.

As with all types of play, the standard rules of BDSM always apply. Before any play, you should negotiate, identify limits and boundaries, agree on safe words/signals, obtain consent, do your research, prepare, and discuss aftercare.

Negotiation, Limits, and Boundaries

The success of a scene is usually determined by the level of negotiation before play. This is no time for bashfulness – those involved need to speak freely and outline their needs, wants, limits and boundaries. Not sure where to start? Here are a few points for discussion:

Consent, Safety, and Checking In

Make sure the scene is safe, sane, and consensual by discussing safe words and safe signals in advance.

Research and preparation

You have an outline for your scene and have negotiated the ins and outs of it, but there’s still work to do before you get going.

The Risks of CNC

All BDSM play carries an element of risk, but edge play is often deemed even more perilous. This doesn’t mean you should shy away from CNC; you just need to play in a safe, sane, and consensual way and be aware of the risks.

The Pleasure of CNC

All BDSM play carries a level of risk, but carried out correctly CNC can also bring a huge amount of pleasure. If you’re new to CNC start slowly, incorporate a few elements, to begin with, and once you’ve mastered those move on to a full scenario.

Despite being extreme, CNC fantasies are relatively common, and this type of play offers the perfect opportunity to lose inhibitions and control. If you’re looking to spice up your D/s relationship and have a penchant for power control, this could be the perfect type of BDSM play for you.

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