Pushing Your Slave Away is a Good Thing

Sometimes you might feel like you give your slave too much of yourself – without getting anything in return. You might begin to feel like you’re the one doing all the work, and you begin to resent this. As a Dominant, you have the right and the responsibility to take care of yourself as you take care of your slave. If this means heading off for a hot bath alone, then that’s what you should do. But too often, Dominants are afraid to push their slaves away, thinking the slave might begin to resent them and stop following the commands they are given. This is far from the case. Pushing your slave away is a good thing. Here’s what you need to know.

Saying No Will Give Them Discipline

Just as you don’t say ‘yes’ to a child each time they ask for a cookie, so should you not acquiesce to every demand or request of your slave. When you do this, you might be giving up your power and your control even though you simply want to make them happy. It’s good to make a slave wait for certain things when it is appropriate. You should give them the feeling of tension that comes along with not knowing if their Mistress is going to give them everything they want. This is especially important in terms of teaching your slave what they receive when they do something correctly. They need to only be rewarded when they have been good, not when they have been bad. Saying ‘no’ provides you with another method of training for discipline. A slave who can wait for what they want is a far more attentive slave, after all.

Putting Your Needs First

The business of being a Dominant is hard work. When you don’t take care of yourself, it will show in your training. You might become lazy, bored, or even careless. Instead of your slave bearing the brunt of your self-neglect, you need to stop to take care of yourself on a regular basis. This might mean pushing your slave away a few nights a week so that you can do things that please you – movie nights, novels, etc. Do things on these times away that restore you and make you feel more alive. Even just a few moments each day that are entirely your own can help you retain your control as a Dominant and your focus as someone who is trying to train a slave.

When Separation Becomes Distance

Of course, pushing a slave away might also be a sign that your relationship is in trouble. When you begin to feel as though you don’t want to be with your slave anymore, it’s time to question your relationship and then talk with your slave to see how they feel. Have things changed? Do you need more from your slave? If you begin to feel you and your slave growing apart and you don’t feel the need to do anything about it, chances are good you aren’t just in need of ‘you’ time; you’re in need of a new slave. Sit down to talk with your slave to see whether they are experiencing the same feelings you are – if not, try to find ways to smooth over the rough parts of your relationship. Or find a way to end the contract.

Pushing your slave away from time to time is good for the both of you. With this freedom, you can both rejuvenate yourselves and bring energy back into your playtime. Chances are good the little time away is all you need to make your training as effective as ever.

To Learn more about punishment, discipline and creating a kinky environment that
you can enjoy visit ===> BDSM Training Techniques

Don’t forget to look at O/our more advanced Dominant training techniques at
===> The BDSM Training Academy


Master Bishop
Founder: The BDSM Training Academy

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3 thoughts on “Pushing Your Slave Away is a Good Thing”

  1. Thank You for this article. You are so right but I just wanted to add that I also explained to my little slave boy that I do need time for My self. A lot of times I will give him something to do while I take time for my self. As in any relationship, communication is important. As this is the relationship he wanted.

    Thanks Again

  2. Again you continue to amaze me with your insight on the D/s relationship. Thank you so much, this article actually helped me with a situation I am dealing with now. Thanks again, Lidia

  3. This article is exactly what I needed. Feeling inclined day after day to keep My pet happy is exhausting. When I find I do not give Myself enough time to Me it does come through even when I do not notice My pet does.
    Thank you,

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