The Journey to a Semi-Formal Dinner Event:

I’m not sure how the fantasy came to be. Perhaps it was something i read in one of my erotic novels or a scene in an old Victorian Romance Drama put to film.  But for me the mere thought and vision of serving a thoughtfully prepare meal to a person i am in-service to, or to be servant to guests my owner has invited to dinner stirs a longing and desire deep within me.  Feelings so strong and so intimate, much like the way  i feel when i am being skillfully and slowing guided into the crescendo of orgasm.

Yes, i see serving as an elegant ballroom dance with everyone moving in time to a specific melody. An opportunity for open expressions of gratitude, obedience and love and when performed properly, and with a confidant grace at the end, you may bow your head in humble appreciation for the opportunity to offer what your heart desires to share.

i am fortunate to be able to serve Master  dinner every evening and W/we entertain large gatherings of family and friends on occasion but my fantasy, well that was hungry,  no, desperate for something a bit more intimate with more of a Master/servant , Dominate/submissive **flavor**. My fantasy included inviting other lifestyle friends to partake in an evening of fine dining, excellent service and focused attentions.  Yes a plan was forming in my submissive head and before i could stop it, it rolled over me like the heat from Master‘s hand spreading across my… oh sorry lost in my fantasy again…

So while lying in Master’s arms one evening, feeling warm and safe and loved in the afterglow of His manipulations i began to share my fantasy and desires to serve Him at a Semi-Formal Diner event.  Of course that brought to mind Master sitting at a table in a Suit and tie and well, my fantasy began taking on more form and direction and the fire inside began to glow red hot again… the thought only broken by Master’s reply, “I think this is a wonderful idea and a good project for that over active mind of yours.” “Why don’t you put something together, a plan, it sounds like an excellent evening. “

“Yes Sir”

i began with research. There are many sites you can search for Fine dining service, or Formal serving guides, there are at least a hundred books all designed to educate you in the art of serving.  The information was bountiful to say the least. There were chapters dedicated to menu planning, the guest list, invitations, table linens and setting, serving guides and techniques, after Dinner service and thank you notes.  Most of the information focused on formal dining and most were very similar in basic etiquettes and serving guides, techniques and practice.  One common principle shared and expressed throughout my research was, the key to excellent service is to be attentive……. Well, i thought, certainly we could build from there and work out a plan.. So that is where i started.  Attention to the details.

i will admit that i was a bit overwhelmed and frankly intimidated by some of the information i read. i felt that for a beginner / novice to this type of service event perhaps something a bit less FORMAL would be easier.  Also, i wanted to encourage others to take this opportunity to participate and experience this type of evening, either in service or as an Honored Guest to be served.   So with the help of many resources, and encouragement from Master and lifestyle friends i began putting together a Semi-formal diner event guide.

Now i have absolutely nothing against Formal. In fact i hope one day in the near future to have enough knowledge and training to actually plan, execute and serve a formal diner.

But for this journey my objective was to create an environment and event/scene to fill a fantasy i have replayed a thousand times, and to see if i could perhaps offer others a simple guide they can use to host their own Semi-Formal event and experience  a new level of submission and connection through service.

The first part of this Journey will be the Plan. Part two, you will be invited to join the dinner. i will take you to the event i was honored to co-host with another submissive friend.  Then i will share some of the comments, recommendations and critiques received from our Guests.

i hope you will enjoy my personal journey and find some useful tidbit to help you on your journey.


While reading articles and books and other’s guides i began picking key elements to creating an event. With this information i began by creating a Semi-Formal Service Etiquette guide. The Key focus:  Attention to details but *KISS*  *keep it simple, silly”* 

i am open to critiques and i am certain that i have probably missed some very important elements but this was created as a simple guide to assist in creating an experience within a less formal setting. Also as you join us for dinner (part 2) you will find that several of the initial rules were modified and or changed on the *Fly * so to speak…


Service Dinner – Semi-Formal Service Etiquette

by  sub-kathleen

Serving is a gift we give to our Master/Dominant/Top. Elegance and grace should be part of our presentation and practice is the best way to insure that we are serving properly.

Showing proper respect and obedience to our Master/Dominant/Top and being a source of pride to our Master/Dom/Top is our goal. Let’s be the best slave/submissive/bottom that we can be.

Semi-Formal Dining Service Etiquette


Uniform: Recommended but can be negotiated prior to the dinner party.

  • Red top – Shirt/blouse/sweater/corset
  • Black bottom – Skirt/Pant
  • Shoes – Black – Dress/Heals – recommend comfortable heal height

Table Setting:

  • Napkin – To the Right of the place setting
  • Knife and Fork – On top of the napkin – Right side of place setting
  • Spoon – to the Left of the place setting
  • Bverage Glass on the Right above the napkin
  • Water Glass on the Left side of place setting above the spoon

Serving Your Master/ Dominant/Top:

  • Dinner Food service:    Always serve from the right side
  • Place meal items onto plate making certain to not over fill
  • Place the diner plate with the main food item directly in front of your M/D/T

Dinner Beverage service: Always serve on the Left side

  • Always serve beverages from the left.
  • Place beverage glass to the Top Left of your M/D/T plate being careful not to spill.
  • Keep your M/D/T beverage glass fresh and full at all times.
  • Water Service: Always keep water glass filled unless otherwise instructed by your M/D/T.
  • Always fill glass from Left side.

Desert Food service:

  • Make certain all dinner plates a removed from table.
  • Place fresh napkins, forks and spoons in proper place in front of your M/D/T.
  • Prepare plate and using the Food service rules serve your M/D/T desert plate.

After Dinner Beverage service: Always serve on the Left side

  • Follow same rules as Dinner beverage service.

General Rules:

  • Always keep your M/D/T plate clean and filled with fresh food.
  • Always keep water glass and beverage glass filled unless otherwise instructed.
  • If You are a single Master/Dominate/Top, a single slave/submissive/bottom will be
    assigned to serve You.
  • If you are a single submissive/slave/bottom you will be assigned to a single
    Master/Dominant/Top to serve or you will be assigned a serving task such as water –
    beverage or desert or valet service.
  • All slaves/submissives/bottoms will be responsible for set up, serving and clean up.


Well now here we are. The guide is done.  i have proof read it so many times that my contacts are screaming for moisture relief… yelling  “blink damn it”  Ok , i guess I’m ready to present it to Master.

It is a week night and Master has finished dinner. W/we are in the kitchen sharing the after dinner clean up and talking about O/our day. This is a favorite time for me.  The kitchen is one of my safe rooms. This is a room where, as long as i am respectful,  i may speak open and freely on any subject and i am not held to protocols. Master is typically washing dishes. He loves to decompress at the sink while i flutter around and speak almost non-stop about my day.  In between breaths… just kidding, Master shares his day with me, then sometimes we discuss the plan for the evening and sometimes i am excused to attend to other tasks or services Master may require… Oops getting off topic again…

i am particularly excited and nervous today because the guide is complete and  i am going to share my Dinner service fantasy, the Etiquette guide i created and my outline for fulfilling this plan/scene with Master.

Finishing up in the kitchen, oh my, my hands are shaking.  Taking deep breaths, i listen as Master finishes His instruction for the evening and then i say, “Sir, i have finished the etiquette guide Sir. He crooks His eye brows and smiles just a bit and says “ How did you manage to hold that in until after dinner?” “Well where is it?” with a sigh of relief i reply, “Sir it is open on my Computer waiting for You.”  Master nods, turns to leave the kitchen and says “I’ll have coffee in the office while I’m reading  thank you.”

As Master reads, i sit on the floor at His feet. My heart is pounding and my head is spinning with one thought.  Please let my work please Him. As He sits back sipping His coffee and reading i’m being tortured by His silence and the blank look on His face.  Then without realizing it i am panting with anticipation. Oh please let Him be pleased. i don’t know how long i sat there, honestly i was so crazy with nervous energy it felt like forever… i know another lesson in patience… ugh!!!! Then He turns in the chair faces me and says ”It is just what I would have expected from you and more” It’s great” “Now tell me the rest of the plan”

i thought i was going to self-combust at that point.. i was overwhelmed and busting with excitement.  He was pleased.  i could barely contain myself but …and then with grace and gratitude, i bowed my head, moved from sit position to kneel at Master feet leaned forward and kissed His feet, “thank Sir”.

After guiding me to sit in His lap i shared more of my plan. Explaining how i could execute such an event and what my hopes for the entire evening would be.  When i finally finished talking Sir’s ear off He encouraged me to pursue this event and discuss it with some of my submissive friends to see if perhaps they had some interest in being a part of this type of event.  Well, that’s all i needed, before i could stop myself the 2nd part of the plan began forming.. Place, time, number of guests, menu, table setting, serving guides… So much to do…

Wait, how does He do that?  How does He ignite such passion and courage and determination in me with just simple instruction, encouragement and that wicked almost challenging smile?

It’s late now, Master is sleeping and i feel completely drained and totally fulfilled. Tonight’s connection with Master, bringing Him into the fantasy, turning it over to Him and trusting Him to treat it with care, was so intimate. Trusting Him to take it seriously, nurture it, encourage it and guide me to experience it. It was as real and passionate and fulfilling as any planned sexually intimate scene.

Now as i lay here my mind is drifting off to the extended fantasy.  The images of a table filled with Masters/Dominates/Tops drifts into my mind. They are all in semi-formal dress attire sitting around a beautifully prepared table. There is laughter, they seem to be enjoying some lighthearted conversation and they are waiting to be served. Then i drift off into the kitchen. i can see the servers, we are in serving uniform and……Ohhh.

To Be continued:

i hope you enjoyed this article.  If you have read others i have written you will see that i write from personal experience only.. This article is intended to offer simple tips and to share my own experiences as i grow and move through this amazing journey.  i hope you will join me for pat 2 –  The Dinner – A semi-formal event.

0/5 (0 Reviews)

1 thought on “The Journey to a Semi-Formal Dinner Event:”

  1. Hello miss kathleen.
    i found this post enthralling. i love the serving fantasy but i’m intrigued by the way you talk.
    I’ll be blunt: i think you might understand my story, i’d benefit from discussing this with you. If you ever find the time to help out a like minded sub, please contact me. i know this might seem odd but i’ve been struggling to find a kindred spirit in this big world.

    Thanks and kind regards,


Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Didn't Get Any BDSM Gear For The Holidays At The BDSM Academy
The BDSM Training Academy Logo

This site is for consenting adults

over 18+ years of age only!


By Clicking  "Yes, I am over 18+ years old" you agree the following statements are true:

* I am over 18+ years of age
* I will not allow any minors to access this site or any material found herein

BDSM Training Academy Join Us

74% OFF



The BDSM Training Program

You Have Got My Mind Racing!

I have been rereading your book over and over, each time I learn something new.


Thanks to you I finally realize how strong of a person I am! 

P.S. just love all the new tricks I have learned

Mistress Sarah

Scroll to Top