Who Says You Can’t Have Kids and a BDSM Relationship?

Hi Mistress Sophia and Master Bishop,

I have absolutely loved all the emails you have sent and learned
so much from each.

There is one problem that my husband and I are having and that is
that we have three children, but we want to experience more
within our Dom/sub relationship.

We have just started exploring bdsm within our relationship, but I
don’t want our children to know about it.

How do you live this lifestyle without exposing your children to it?

Sincerely,

Nora, Phoenix

******************************************************************

Here Are My Comments:

I can understand your concern, as children or anyone under the age
of 18 years old should never be exposed to bdsm and/or other adult
activities.

When it comes to a spicier sex life, you’re going to be taking some
risks. With BDSM, the risks are even higher, though the rewards
are just as great. But when you have kids, can you still have the
BDSM you crave? After all, with the screaming, spanking, and
sweating, is their a greater chance of your children finding out?

The simple answer is no. With careful planning and some creativity,
you can still have the BDSM relationship you want – and your
children won’t know.

**********************
Turn Up the Volume
**********************

One of the easiest ways to keep your children from hearing anything
you’re doing is to turn up your radio, CD, or mp3 player while
you’re having fun. True, this might also attract a little more
attention to your play times, but your children would much rather be
hearing Enigma a little too loudly than someone screaming. Of
course, that is what gags are for.

***********************
Find Your Own Space
***********************

Ideally, your bedroom or your play area should be as far away from
the kids as you can get it. If you can move your bedroom to
another room, that might help to cut down the noise a bit more.
Basements and first floor bedrooms are ideal for louder sessions.
You will also want to install a lock on your bedroom door that is
not easy to pry. This way, your children can stay outside of the
room until you are dressed and ready to see them.

Of course if your children are not old enough to take care of
themselves then they should never be left unattended. Night
time while your kids sleep is a good opportunity for play
without them knowing.

***********************
Scheduling Sessions
***********************

If possible, you can always schedule your BDSM time for times when
your children are not around or awake. This way, you can minimize
anything they hear while you have your own fun.

Or you can take your BDSM activities to play clubs where no one but
other BDSM lovers will be witnessing your domination and submission
times. You can even plan a nice bdsm get away with your partner
while the grandparents babysit for the weekend.

******************************
Under the Radar Submission
******************************

Of course, sometimes, you want to maintain your submissive and
dominant roles, even when you’re not in the bedroom, but can you
really say ‘yes sir’ and ‘no ma’am’ when you’re around the kids?
If you’re nervous that your children are going to catch on, you
might want to employ different signals for submission in the public
eye. For example, if the sub is out of line, there might be a
special word or touch the dominant can use to warn them of their
misdeed. The sub might also play a role of the subservient one in
the family situations – cooking, cleaning, etc. – to help continue
their service to their Dom/me.

****************************
Create an Emergency Plan
****************************

Some parents may not be too thrilled to think about separate areas
for their play times or about a lock on their bedroom door – what
if there is an emergency? Have your children learn a special way
to attract attention at your door if there actually is an emergency
so that everyone can stay safe.

****************************************
Other Tips for Keeping Things Hidden
****************************************

* Have a lock box or locked cupboard for your toys
* Never bruise or mark your partner somewhere the children might see
* Never be physically abusive in front of the children, even if it’s
in fun. Children will not be able to tell the difference.

If you are ‘caught,’ explain that everything is okay and that no
one is hurt. That’s really all children need to know. They
actually don’t need to know the details about why you’re into BDSM
in the first place.

Having a BDSM relationship can be difficult when you’re sharing a
home with children, but it’s certainly not impossible. BDSM
doesn’t have to be 24/7, just enjoy every opportunity when you
can.

==================================================================
I hope that answers the question.
Keep your eyes peeled for the next edition which will arrive in a
few weeks!

To learn more tips and ideas on how to incorporate bdsm training
into your life visit===> BDSM Training

**Please Note: The BDSM Slave Training team only provides opinion
about the safe, sane and consensual performance of bdsm and/or
other adult activities. This means that bdsm and/or other adult
activities are at all times to only be performed with consenting
adults. An adult being anyone over 18+ years of age or the legal
age in your state/country.

BDSM and/or other adult activities can never be performed with
anyone under the age of 18 years old.

Regards,

Mistress Sophia
& Master Bishop

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