How To Become A Mistress

Dominatrix Question

I am in a relationship with a man who is very much into S & M. He is always looking at Mistresses via the web and has been trained previously. I have trained him occasionally however usually after alcohol. He loves Mistresses with big breast which I have the complete opposite and I would like to know a few tips on how I can get him to do what I want and take me seriously. I did start working with a dominatrix last year and learnt a few things which I enjoyed but I can’t seen to get my boyfriend where I want him. Also he never wants straight sex which I am trying to get used to. Are these common problems? Any information you can give shall be greatly received. Kind Regards, M

Mistress Brianne’s Opinions

Become a Mistress 101

Your partner wants you to dominate them, but what do you do when he wants you to be his Mistress in the bedroom all the time? For some women, being domineering isn’t a role they want to take on, but for others, the surge of power they feel is pretty intoxicating. By learning a few things about dominating your man, you can begin to make all of his sexual fantasies come true and you might just learn to love the dominatrix role as well.

First things first, it is never a good idea to mix alcohol and/or drugs with any type of BDSM play. It lowers inhibitions and reduces reaction time, which can only lead to disaster.

Are You the Dominant Type?

You need to stop right now and think about whether you are willing to take on the Mistress role all of the time or if you are even comfortable with the idea without the use of alcohol. If you have a partner who only wants you to dominate them and not have any sort of vanilla sex, it’s time for a chat. You need to talk to each other about both of your needs and learn what each individual would like in the relationship. Try talking about what you both will have to do to change your sex life and what you can both do to come to an understanding. Though you might not mind the change in the roles, you need to be comfortable with what you’re doing or else neither of you is going to have fun. This has to be a decision you can both agree with.

Remember there are two people in this relationship, so he shouldn’t get his way all the time. Then again that is the beauty of being a Dominatrix because you can have whatever you want and he will comply.

Trying on the Leather Boots

A good idea for you is to try on the role of being a dominatrix. This doesn’t just have to be sexual. Do you like getting massages? Not a problem, ask for one and he shall obey. Need a manicure or pedicure, while you relax and watch one of your favorite shows, I’m sure your servant won’t mind obliging. How about a fresh glass of lemonade being made for you when you walk through the door after a hard day at work. Let him know that he needs to make you happy to earn the right to be Dominated in the bedroom. You might find that he responds so strongly to pleasing you that you can’t wait to get into the bedroom to give him what he has earned.

While he is trying to please you, ask him what kinds of things he would enjoy you doing to him inside the bedroom. It can help to begin with some sort of list of things he wants you to do to him. This way, you will know exactly what he wants and what he doesn’t want. You can then try these things out on him, slowly. Never do too much at one time.

What does this mean? You need to slowly break down your partner in order to make him feel as though you are the one who is in charge. You will do this by having him always do certain things when you are together. For example, he might have to always call you Mistress when you are together and ask for your permission to do anything. Whenever he does not remember to do so, that’s when you either punish him or you stop the session. This sort of control method works as in order to get back to his fantasy, he needs to start paying attention to your commands.

Progressing from Beginner to Mistress

But that’s just child’s play. In order to become a Mistress as opposed to just a woman who wants to be in charge, you need to do more. You need to begin to take control in ways that he might not be expecting. For example, you might want to:

• Create lists of tasks for him to accomplish each day – You want to make sure that he is always thinking of you, even when you’re not in the bedroom. As a sort of prelude to dominating later, make sure he serves his Mistress by doing things for her during the day too.
• Determine punishments that actually hurt him – You want to find ways to punish your new slave so that he knows you are the one in control.
• Withhold orgasm –The best way to control a man? Withhold orgasm from him during scenes and instruct him to hold off on masturbating. Teach him to worship your body. He may love big breasts on women now, but he will learn in time to worship you and your body. He will learn that his orgasms come from you and only you. Therefore you will become the sole sexual Goddess in his universe, in time he won’t even look at another woman.

Being a Mistress isn’t for everyone, but it can be a way to spice up your relationship, assuming you’re both ready and comfortable with the power exchange.


Getting in touch with your Mistress side takes a little practice, and a lot of knowledge but once you get started, you’ll begin to see just how rewarding controlling someone else is. And that soft touch will be a thing of the past. For more information on how to unleash your inner Dominatrix go to:

Mistress Training Tutorial

Don’t forget the advanced Dominatrix lesson to getting you sub to do whatever you want from just the sound of your voice.

How To Talk Like A Dominatrix


Mistress Brianne

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5/5 (2 Reviews)

3 thoughts on “How To Become A Mistress”

    1. CHASITY Dawn ENIX
      Yes, I do believe that everyone deserves the right to be happy to feel love and to be able to free themselves some of us are not able to free ourselves as easily as others I do not discriminate against sex religion ethnicity or gender and I have no corals against performing such activities towards individuals that may be a bit unorthodox I am not squeamish nor am I afraid of any orfice on a human body and I do feel that I have what it takes To perform any duty that is asked of me I am just not sure how to go about it or where to go to get the training that I would need to do so but I am 100% confident and comfortable in doing whatever is necessary.

    2. Absolutely, why would it not be ok to love another person?
      You are human and loving someone who loves and cares for you is a natural and beautiful thing. BDSM, Domination and submission is supposed to enhance your life not create some alternate unfeeling environment.

      Please don’t ever think you can’t love because you are Dominant. Love is a beautiful and I believe should be fully embraced and shared.


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