Slave or Submissive: What Do You Want?

In the world of BDSM, there are a number of different ways to define your relationship. For example, you might be a submissive to a partner, but do you want to be a true slave or a submissive? While all slaves are submissives, not all submissives are slaves. And that’s where it can get a little confusing. Whether you’re in a BDSM relationship now or you long for one in the future, it’s time to think about how you define your role in relation to your Dom/me.

The Slave and Dominant

If you were to fantasize about being dominating by someone else, you’re probably going to first think of the stereotypical slave and Dom/me relationship. Within this arrangement, the slave is going to completely submit to their Dominant on all levels – physically, emotionally, and mentally. This slave might be a full time slave or they might simply be committed to training with only one Dom/me. They would complete a course of training in order to serve their Dom/me in some way. No matter where they were at or who they were with, their Dom/me would be the one who calls the shots.

This is an intensive relationship in which the Dom/me focuses their attention on creating a perfect slave, however this might be defined for them. The slave would probably sign a formal contract as well, agreeing to certain terms and activities within the relationship. These two people are often romantically linked as well, sharing sexual contact as well as slave training.

The Submissive and Dominant

However, if you’re interested in just being submissive to a Dominant figure from time to time, then you might be more of a submissive than a slave. A submissive agrees to hand over control to someone else for an agreed amount of time. They might be in a relationship with someone else and have BDSM encounters on occasion, but they are probably not undergoing any sort of training schedule. They simply allow someone else to dominate them, with certain rules and restrictions and an agreement beforehand.

This submission might spread to the real world as well, but more often than not, a submissive is someone who only submits within the bedroom or dungeon. A slave is always going to be submissive to their Dom/me, so slaves are automatically submissives as well.

Both is Better?

As with any relationship you might have with someone else, you need to make sure this is something that makes you happy. For some, the idea of only giving over some of their control, some of the time is just not enough. So, you might be someone who wants to find a partner who will dominate them all of the time – leading to a slave and submissive lifestyle or arrangement. This tends to yield more results in terms of training a slave to be a certain way or to maintain a certain state of mind more often than not. However, these sorts of slave relationships are more time and energy consuming, so they are not always realistic for the majority of relationships.

Whether you call yourself slave or submissive or both, your dedication to the role you choose will allow you to get the most from it. Sit down with your partner to talk about what you envision and then see what they are able to do and able to give to you in return. You might find that this sort of slave relationship fantasy is not going to work out at the current moment – but it might in a few months or years. Thus, you can start off with submissive trysts and work your way up to more and more control.

To Learn more about yourself, your submissive desires and the type of relationship
you need to have in your life go to ===> The Slave Training Tutorial


Master Bishop
Mistress Sophia

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