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The Difference Between BDSM And Abuse

The Difference Between BDSM & Abuse

BDSM is meant to enhance and strengthen a healthy, loving relationship. In no way shape or form, would W/we ever support any form of abuse. It is wrong to physically or emotionally lash out at another person and cause that person any form of mental, emotional or physical harm or duress.
In the image below you will be able to see a list of the big differences that I believe separate BDSM from abuse. Have a look and let Me know what you think.

Fake vs Real Dominants infographic Small

The Difference Between Fake And Real Dominants

Choosing the Dominant that you want to serve is a serious decision. One that is taken far too lightly but in fact should not be. Making yourself mentally and physically vulnerable to the wrong person can have terrible repercussions. A genuine Dominant can produce a supportive relationship that will allow a submissive to feel safe enough to be their true self thus allowing for more intense experiences. In the image below you will be able to see a list of the big differences that I believe separate BDSM from abuse. Have a look and let Me know what you think.

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The Strength Within Submission

Submissive Self-Collaring

When I first found the kink world, I suppose what I was looking for was direction. As a submissive, little, and pet, having a guardian in the lifestyle and life was something that appealed to me. What I discovered after finding myself in lackluster partnerships, toxic pairings, and uncomfortable situations was that a part of me was looking for someone to lead me because I …

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Starting A BDSM Scene

Starting A BDSM Scene

My first experience crafting a scene with a submissive partner was a disaster. I read somewhere that you should have the submissive say some sort of repetitive mantra to begin the scene. The idea was to get her to have positive affirmation about being submissive to me and… whatever.

She was just not into it, the whole thing got derailed from the beginning, and I scrambled to recover.
First times are fraught with complexity and questions and awkwardness, and BDSM first times are not exempt.

It’s easy to forget what it’s like when you finally find someone that wants to play (win!) and is going to let you be dominant (double win!). But then what do you do next?

I’m going to do my best to help you through starting a scene.

Healing With Kink Part 2

Kink Healing: Part 2

A continuation of kink healing part 1 to delve deeper into understanding the potential healing power of kink.

When I first found BDSM I had many misconceptions about the potential of the lifestyle. I was under the impression BDSM was just a fun bedroom activity to escape the real world and that it could be a place to connect with other “freaks” like myself. While there is a level of truth to that, the more I leaned into the lifestyle, the more I discovered it’s true potential. Because the BDSM world is so steeped in vulnerability, connection, and communication, it serves as the perfect arena for growth and personal development.

When I came to this conclusion, it delved deeper into experimenting with different elements of BDSM and whether or not it could transform my life.

Why I Love Playing With Floggers

Why Flogging Is My Favorite Impact Play

A submissive girl I met at a munch invited me to my first play party. As my evening began, I was full of hopes and dreams and countless fantasies, but exceptionally short on experience. Not only did I learn a lot on that evening, but I got to play for the first time too. And that experience created a lifelong love of impact play that …

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Kink Healing

Kink Healing

The kink lifestyle has always been incredibly fruitful for me. I’ve been able to explore myself sexually, discover what makes me tick, and been able to tap into pleasures I never knew could exist. Beyond the physical pleasure, I’ve been fortunate enough to have found a place of healing within the kink lifestyle. I am someone who has suffered from mental health illness since my …

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Behavior Modification Thirst For More

Behavior Modification: My Thirst for Self-Improvement

My nose sits uncomfortably close to the smooth baby blue bedroom wall and my eyes are drawn to the tiny spider that’s edging its way to the corner. I’m itching to shift my weight from foot to foot and stretch my arms toward the ceiling, but I don’t. Instead, I sigh inwardly and mentally run through the events that led to the extended period of …

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Dominance Through submission BDSM

What I Learned as a Submissive Helped Me be a Better Dominant

I was sweeping the lobby of a dungeon in Dallas when a sudden burst of emotion overtook me, and I began to cry. It wasn’t sadness, but an overarching swell of what I was doing, who I was doing it for, and a deep sense of presence in that moment. Over the course of the last 20 plus years I’ve been a member of the …

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Devotion within the BDSM Lifestyle

BDSM Lifestyle 101: Making Your Fantasy a Reality

I will forever remember the day I realized the lifestyle I had only ever dreamed possible, was actually my reality. Way back in December 2014, I knelt before my Sir, lifted my hair into a ponytail, and felt the titanium of my collar lock around my neck. I was in Heaven. Pure bliss. And couldn’t believe my fantasies were now a reality–and how in love …

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BDSM Hogtie Pleasures

Heightened Hogtie Pleasures

As a Board-Certified Clinical Sexologist, I counsel individuals and couples in overcoming barriers they may be experiencing with orgasm. Guiding individuals through experiences to ensure that they experience their best orgasm. In BDSM different positions can be utilized to not only bring on a different state of mind, but different types of orgasms and sensations that can release a new kind of energy and pleasure. …

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You Have Got My Mind Racing!

I have been rereading your book over and over, each time I learn something new.

D

Thanks to you I finally realize how strong of a person I am! 

P.S. just love all the new tricks I have learned

Mistress Sarah

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