What would you think if I were to tell you that 40% of men either have difficulty reaching orgasm or have never had an orgasm? You probably wouldn’t believe Me for a second. A man not capable of having an orgasm that is completely unheard of. In fact, it is a commonly held belief that all men are fully capable of having an orgasm. That belief is solely based on the fact that each man is built with the same equipment.
If this is the case for men, then why is it a commonly held belief that some women will never be able to orgasm. Women are all born with the same working parts. If one woman is capable of having an orgasm then logic would suggest that all women are physically capable of it. Yet Female Sexual Dysfunction (FSD-the inability to orgasm) is as high as 43 percent according to some statistics.
Now some of these issues can be attributed to physical ailments such as a thyroid condition or diabetes. But the biggest issue that causes a woman (and men) to suffer from an inability to orgasm has been due to anxiety, depression, stress, other mental block or a combination. It would appear that the biggest stumbling block is not a physical issue but a mental issue.
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To me this makes sense, because even for a man to orgasm it is more mental then physical. I’m sure you have heard a guy repeating the phrase “Margaret Thatcher naked, Margaret Thatcher naked…” or rambling on about baseball statistics all in a desperate attempt to resist ejaculating. You see even men use mental distraction to prevent them from having an orgasm. Therefore if a woman is distracted or has a million problems running through her head it can be next to impossible to free up her mind to allow herself to orgasm.
I believe that it is the lack of focus on a woman’s mind that makes having an orgasm so difficult. The physical stimulation just helps to feed the mind. It’s the fuel your mind needs to help keep the embers burning within you. A signal that directs and focuses your attention, rather then allowing your mind to wander. This could potentially be why many people enjoy being submissive. Once you hear your Dominant command you, a submissive is forced to block out any and all distractions, while they focus solely on what turns them on. Physical stimulation is not necessary to achieve an orgasm. In actuality, both men and women are fully capable of having an orgasm solely from their mind.
That is why we need to spend more of our time focused on the mind. The mind should always be your primary focus, because its the mind that signals the body to orgasm. I have experienced first hand the benefits of being able to give a woman a mental orgasm with nothing more then the words from My mouth. These kinds of orgasms are truly breathtaking to watch and their buildup is just as intense. Hear what sub cee had to say about her first mental orgasm.
sub cee's experience
From what I have read and from my own personal experience I believe that female orgasms are a manifestation of what is happening in your head. Whether it be relaxation and trust or whether you are imagining you and your partner in the hottest sex scene of your life, you body will follow where your mind will lead it.
As women we are raised to think that we aren’t supposed to embrace ourselves sexually. We are taught to keep quiet about our desires and the things that turn us on. We are taught that it is inappropriate for us to have sexual thoughts and even more so to say them out loud. Is it any wonder that a significant percentage of us are having issues?
If a woman could learn to embrace and control her arousal through her mind there would be no need for medication or therapy. Our minds are so much more powerful than we give them credit for.
I experienced my first mental orgasm 2 nights ago when speaking with a man whom I very much adore and trust. We have a bit of a unique relationship in my eyes so although I did not expect for him to initiate what happened, I welcomed it.
We often talk until we fall asleep and during this particular conversation I was incredibly sexually frustrated and had been for the days leading up to this conversation. Every time I touched myself I grew more and more frustrated. It was such a vicious cycle.
He was putting me to bed as he does sometimes which consists of putting me in a state of hypnosis. During this state my sexual frustration grew and grew. I was squirming and throbbing. He seemed to sense this as my hypnosis started to take an unexpected turn.
I could feel him enter my mind as he started to implant a scene in my head that made me incredibly hot and wet. I could feel myself pulsing and throbbing more and more yet there was nothing and no one touching me, not even myself.
He was caressing my mind with his sweet, beautiful words. I can’t explain what his voice does to me and at this point I could really feel myself starting to tighten. My back was starting to arch. It was if I could feel his breath all over me. He took me higher and higher. My body was begging for release. My mind was on the brink of climax. Nothing existed but his voice and the blood pumping through my veins.
With a single word from him, I erupted. No physical stimulation. No touching. I came to nothing but his whispers in my ear and it was one of the hottest experiences I have ever had in my entire life.
I came so hard I was shaking. Even when I thought the orgasm was over, it kept going. It kept pouring out of me and I couldn’t stop it even if I wanted it to.
Before this experience, I was very much frustrated with how my body was responding to physical stimulation. I couldn’t seem to get myself to the point where I was relaxed or satisfied.
I relied on stimulating myself with touch above anything else. I knew that I enjoyed my orgasms when a partner caused them much more than when they were caused by my own doing. I just never fully understood why. I knew that it felt so much better for some reason.
I believe, now that I’ve experienced the power of a mental orgasm, that my best orgasms come from being mentally and emotionally connected with someone. I can’t help but crave the hold he had on my mind. It’s such a wonderful feeling to be so relaxed and to trust someone so much even if they aren’t there in person.
I light up every time I think about it and can feel myself start to swell. I now know I’d rather have someone reach into my mind to give me pleasure than for me to just physically stimulate myself. In fact since this experience my orgasms hardly have been the same as they were before. I’m so much more aware of what’s happening within myself.
This orgasm gave me a greater release and satisfaction than any of the times I had touched myself. It surpassed the majority of the orgasms I’ve ever had.
I felt so completely content and relaxed afterwards. Anyone can penetrate your body, but it takes a really special person to penetrate your mind and leave it in a better state when they leave it than when they enter it. I have to give credit to the man in my life that showed me what my mind is capable of. I don’t think I could have had this experience with anyone else. I would love to do it more and further explore this uncharted territory in women’s sexuality.
If you are having a difficult time climaxing then it might be due to a lack of stimulation mentally. Take some time to sit down with your Dominant and discuss the kind of mental stimulation you need to really push your body over the edge. If however, your problem is more deeply routed within a mental state of anxiety, depress or other mental block then it might be beneficial to seek professional psychological help to dig down into the cause.
I hope this helps to free your mind so your body may experience all the ecstasy it can release. Mental orgasms are the main reason a submissive is able to learn how to orgasm on command
By Master Bishop
The founder of the BDSM Training Academy. Master Bishop has been involved in the Dominant/submissive lifestyle for over 20 years. With a love for education both learning and teaching, Master Bishop has passed on his knowledge and experience to others entering into the BDSM lifestyle for over 15 years.
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